Sudden realization.

Death. Have you ever been sat down and told if you don't treat this problem you're going to die? Do you understand how scary that is? "Olivia if you don't get your asthma treated you will end up dying" that's what was said to me today in the doctors office. I was then given drugs that might make me have an allergic reaction. Put on more drugs that might make me crazy. Given even more drugs that if the other drugs make me crazy take these drugs to even myself out. Then more proair more qvar. What are they going to do next? Oh and I might get addicted to the pills that will mellow me out if I don't take the with care. I can't take my concerta because that might fuck me up. So no concentration for me for a while. I'm like a human tester. Let's see what we can put Olivia onto next. Maybe one day I'll have my own room in kaiser permanente. The best part of this check up was the doctor put my mom in her place. It was awesome I love this doctor. Btw I got a shot in the butt today. By an Asian. Who hates getting shots too. So cross your fingers that I'm finally treating my asthma correctly and that my treatment keeps my alive. Stay away from the white light. Only good is up ahead.