Sometimes I wish so badly that I could be back at home. Not bored. Entertained. No huge money issues. My mommy. My daddy. My comfy bed. Not needing to pay for food, laundry, conditioner or shampoo or any body products in general, clothes, or extra things. I wish I could buy extra things. I wish I didn't have a worry about my money or in this case having a budget of $400 a month. I hate the stress's and the boredom. Not knowing what to do with yourself. But then again wasn't I complaining about these problems before too? Being bored, having money problems, blahblahblah. I can't wait till I find a place where I won't need to write these stupid blogs on how bored or unsatisfied I am. I love Israel to death and I am having an amazing time but, I want more! I want to see more, meet new people, do more things, anything! Well until next time.

The things I think.

Backwards forwards on off jump sink add subtract. I wish I was coasting, sun roof down, music bumping, the ganja flowing, and my friends by my side. I want the California sun light, the rare rainy days, and the unexpected played games. I miss driving up to the house and knowing I am in for a great time. The smoke filled garage and the mismatching chairs. Filled up ash trays and the pictures of a lost friend. The laughs that never stop and the thoughts that are somehow always lost. The moments I have had with the family I could never forget. The stupid comments made about the boredom we have created although we never get up we will just bounce off ideas of what we would like to be, would like to do, and would like to see. I have never had such strong feelings for the people I have greeted into my life and will always have them in the back of my mind. Every step I take and new place I encounter I think of how amazing you all would think it was. The beauty I have taken in can't be described. I miss meeting up everyday. Cig and cigar breaks and Mickey D daily munchies. The plans we make for our day, our weekend, our empty times. I miss just sitting there and having nothing to do but having the best time ever. I miss pushing each others buttons because we know each and every button that will set us off. I miss the inside jokes and the meaningless cries. I have been so blessed with my best friends I couldn't ask for anything more. I don't care about the bad times, the shit we have been through, the fights, the drama, the loses, the enemies, the situations we have been put in that no one should ever have to be in, the drug use, the addiction, the boredom. All I want to do is sit in that garage, smoke till I can't move, laugh till I go numb, act as retarded as possible, shit talk, come up with the most crazy ideas, and be with the people I love, the people I most care about, the people I call my family. You have made a hand print on my life that I could never get rid of. You will follow me everywhere, be my guardian angels, the ones I go to for everything. We remember the moments of our lost friend. The times that could never be erased. The love we had for him. The impact he made on our lives. The impact he is still making. He brought us close and has kept us close. We go in and out of our group but will always end up back to the original start. You have made me a stronger person, a better person, a bad person, a loving person, and someone who is apart of something. Thank you. I'll repeat until you don't understand. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Don't ever forget. Don't ever run. Don't stop. My best friends. I never thought it could happen. But you all have filled that spot.